m a r k a n d e y a

The Onion: NK nukes self in desperate plea for attention

Posted by Brian on December 28, 2005

If only it really were true:

PYONGYANG—Frustrated that its megalomaniacal outbursts no longer inspire fear and panic in the international community, the nation of North Korea detonated all six of its nuclear warheads early Thursday morning, killing 32 million in what international observers are calling “a pathetic bid for attention.”

“This is very typical and melodramatic,” South Korean President Roo Moo-hyun said yesterday. “North Korea has been ‘acting out’ for years—decorating its country with provocative posters, never leaving its borders, and getting aggressive with those closest to it. It has been this way ever since it was grounded from the national stage.” UN officials are advising nations who feel self-destructive to speak to allies or counselors.

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